Strange magic: 1 February 2011

Tuesdays are typically slow news days, and today is no exception. Or maybe Brett Favre really is going to retire.  And the Tuesday before the Super Bowl is really a slow one – too soon to get amped up about the game (unless, of course, your team is one of the two in the game) – too far past the weekend games (which, considering the Pro Bowl, is a good thing).  The multitude of college basketball games blur into white noise.  Baseball players are still sleeping 16 hours a day and deciding on what style facial hair to sport come spring.  The NHL does whatever it is the NHL does (certainly not attract viewers or interest), and the NBA … well, don’t get me started.
All this blah-ness leads one to really ponder the greater truths of the Super Bowl and football in general. Like is the NFL simply a metaphor on our society?  Are football players the gladiators of our time? And most importantly, how the hell do they get that yellow first-down line to work? Come on, you know you love that thing.  We all do.  It’s right up there with those little arrows next to the yard-line numbers, pointing toward the goalposts.  It’s a stroke of pure, “well, shut my mouth” genius.  Makes you wonder, now why didn’t I think of that? Probably because you were too busy with your fantasy league to put a computer to good use.  Or you thought it somebody was just real fast with a highlighter during the whole game.  Well, here’s how they do it. Warning: this article may make your head hurt if you’re like me and think technology is best when it can be explained in 10 syllables or less.  But it will make you appreciate the underpaid guys who actually have to work on Super Bowl Sunday so that you won’t have to argue with Uncle Joe over whether not it was a first-down catch. That alone is worth the trouble. So enjoy the peek behind the curtain on the best sports invention since the warning track.

 
Next, this isn’t really news either, but it’s enough to make you go, “Hmmm…”  I think I already knew this, or at least suspected it, but – shocker – a lot of NFL players go flat broke after they quit playing (and drawing a check).  This caught my attention because it featured one of my favorite players, Deuce McAllister.  Read it – you’ll probably see one of yours on the list, too.

 

 

Speaking of things that make you go “Hmmm…” I’m not sure which is stranger in this interivew with Kyle Turley: Turley’s hardly-disguised reference to marijuana or Bob Ley’s decidedly unhip reaction. “Mmmhmm. Mmmhmm.”  And “cannibas?” Is that a “Reefer Madness” reference, Bob?

 

 

And, finally, because it is such a slow news day, there’s little commentary to comment on.  So, I simply offer this: the greatest commentary on the world of boxing. Ever .

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